I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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