pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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