Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
