I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
