I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize