I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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