I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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