Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
