You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
it hurts more in the daytime
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
