but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
