LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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