she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
