is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
