Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
