i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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