I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
why do cheetos always look like penises
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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