Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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