His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Randomize
