so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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