Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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