I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
