You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize