Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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