so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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