remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
