Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize