I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
