My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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