: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
