ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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