Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
