Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
