ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
