Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize