Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
