And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
