ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
