Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
