and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I got inside last night via doggy door
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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