i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
it's like iHOP with fire
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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