The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Randomize
