FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
