hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
