What a fucking waste of an outfit
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
