You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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