At least make sure they are 18
Why
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
