It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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