if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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