garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Randomize
