Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize