the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
