butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
