I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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